Getting Impatient, Irritated, and Annoyed Easily? Blame On these 8 things
So, you used to brag about how you were tolerant in the early days; having lots of patience, a smile glued to your face, almost zero anger issues. But what happened? You have slipped from that altar and cannot figure out why you are experiencing that. Initially, you may not have noticed the changed behaviour but somehow questioned yourself “why am I always angry and irritated for no reason?”, “Why do I get annoyed by small things?”, why am I so impatient with my family and in relationships?”
Or may be your dearest ones pointed fingers on you.
There may be many reasons such as stress, trauma, hormonal imbalance, lack of sleep, poor diet, etc. But along with physical issues, there are mental issues too, which too are modern causes. Sounds interesting? Let’s continue then.
Here I am talking about a person who used to be cucumber head, have enough patient and tolerance but the characteristics have evaporated eventually. You will find people who are congenital short-tempered. They create a bone of contention even in simple conversations. I am not talking about them.
So, find yourself and let’s look at the reasons.
1. Fast internet and technology
Before you get surprised seeing this uncommon, awkward reason I would suggest you calm down. I will tell you why I have mentioned this in the beginning. Fret not.
Let’s be honest. You are up to hear either because you searched for it or came across it. Your electronic device (in which you are reading at now- laptop, PC, tab, or phone) and satisfactory internet are the mediums from your thought to here.
What would happen if the connection was slow or your device lagged like hell? Irritability would have enhanced you and anger would laugh at you like a megalomaniac. One cannot deny the fact that directly or indirectly everyone is triggered to indulge in fast internet and super speedy devices. That is why marketers come up with new offers, advertisements every other day. And why not? The world is progressing blazing fast, everyone is busy like a bee and you cannot be at snail’s pace, sulking at the corner of your room.
Did you notice that even 5 seconds of a lost connection or delayed opening application can make you annoyed? We could wait at least in our early days when internet slowed down or a device lagged. It is true we cannot escape the internet because we breathe in it, all day. The situation has further aggravated during the Covid-19 pandemic and lockdown. We are always glued to the screen even if our eyes dry like a desert.
Of course, we all need a lag-free device and a stable internet connection 24x7. It has become a necessity. But down the memory lane, you could find that our PC used to hang a lot, waited for a page to open while our chins were on our palms. It might not be a pleasant experience, at least we did not allow irritability.
People have become digital goldfish and literally suffer from nomophobia, phantom vibration syndrome. While no one can withdraw from this situation but still it is not that hard to be calm when the internet slows down. I know it is easier said than done, irritability because of too many problems is completely alright but being livid is not the solution.
2. Using too much social media
The favourite phone is ready, so is high-speed internet. What else do people need more? Log in to social media and scroll through till it ends. Well, you may end but new feeds will not. The battle between eternal vs. ephemeral. Now, why am I saying this? Because only a few people are staying away from social media. We check notifications first thing in the morning and last thing in the night.
Recently, I was waiting outside a restaurant for my orders. A girl came and ordered something. In between conversations she always checked her Facebook, Instagram, and WhatsApp. Not a moment she stood doing nothing. Neither I was ogling at her nor peeking into her personal area. But such actions always grab attention. She was getting a little impatient when the order was delayed. It was not much delay though.
What I am trying to say is that people are not addicted to social media, they suffer from FOMO. You always run behind updates not knowing that it turns you into a zombie. Social media algorithms trick with your mind. The moment you search, like, comment, share anything they will show more stuff like that. As said before, you will end but the contents won’t.
If you moderately use social media use as a maximum of one or two hours a day then it is okay. But if the boundary line is crossed, you need to slow down. It is okay if you post something or using at the end of a hectic day to catch up, but not for a long time. Memes, reels, vacation pictures, wedding updates, baby showers may give you temporary pleasure, not permanent happiness. There are many trigger-happy people too. Facebook and Instagram are infested with numerous controversial posts. What is interesting is the comment section. People have time to argue, irrespective of actual knowledge. Can you be happy after being one of them or witnessing them?
Forget blue light while surfing your phone at night especially when going to bed. Too much social media use cause sleep deprivation because you don’t want to miss any updates. You only close your eyes when it signals ‘red’ because of straining. Even in your subconscious mind, all thoughts go to and fro, causing dreams and a lack of quality sleep.
I know it is a bit hard but practice JOMO- Joy of Missing Out. You don’t want to occupy your head with unnecessary information, do you? It takes time but heals a lot.
While digital detox can be a wonderful solution, the best result comes out when you are tired, frustrated with using social media. Forceful action causes withdrawal symptoms, resulting in irritability, impatience, and anger issues.
Be happy with your own likes. You are always special no matter what happens, just like a flower which blooms on its own way, not caring for others.
3. Short videos
Now I can write a whole epic on this but let be precise. Dress is not the only thing when it comes to shorts, videos have also joined the bandwagon. Jokes apart, the trend of short videos is skyrocketing be it Tik Tok, WhatsApp status, Facebook reels, or Instagram reels.
Now, what is the problem? These videos are entertaining, does not take much time and gives you the freedom to switch into another quickly. So, you are not out of content. We used to see either picture posts or long videos, especially on YouTube. But the inventors have understood millennials’ traits. They are restless, impatient. They want more content in a short duration as they want to achieve everything in life. We are being normalised in watching extremely short content and swipe before you blinking eyes.
More and more people are into it and the audience grows bigger day by day. Probably, you have noticed how cinemas were long still interesting. YouTube videos sessions were long yet meaningful. But hardly anyone clicks on a result that shows more than ten minutes long. The most clicked videos are on average five minutes or shorter ones.
All and sundry are already frustrated, especially during pandemic times. Indulging in Instagram reels, Tik Tok videos may give pleasure but deep down they water the ‘impatient’ seed inside you, waiting to be a giant tree. If you know what I mean, the consequences. You will be engaged to reels, leaving errands and being the puppet of the year.
Even Cricket also introduced a short format (T20) game. People would spend on test cricket and ODI. But now short-format sports attract more audiences. One will rather search “how to lose weight in one week” rather than hearing “it takes at least three months to lose weight” from a gym instructor.
The biggest examples are everyday phenomena. Lots of violence, bullying, breakups, anger issues take place because of irritability and impatience.
Let me tell you a secret, you would rather click on the “2 minutes read” article than “10 minutes read”.
Make a habit of the reading book especially before sleep. You will not get an invitation from distractions while reading a book, because when you are in between pages, you are only there. The phone gives you to dive into whatever are you like, accompanied by lots of notifications. However, it is important to turn off device notifications too before picking up a book. It does not have to be a self-help or motivational book; you can choose a thrilling page-turner too.
Trust me, it gives you a good sleep, reducing irritability and impatience.
4. Show off and comparison
Almost everyone knows comparison causes unhappiness. Little do we know that it also causes irritability and anger issues. Lockdown during pandemics has further aggravated the situation. You may have noticed that social media are flooded with friends who have suddenly become creative, productive or fitness freaks. You see their posts every day and sulk for not doing anything. The moment you think of doing something another post appears.
All of a sudden you start to devalue yourself, feel worthless because you believe they are all-rounder, have everything, implementing the loser feeling inside your brain. No matter what you do to curate a social media feed, someone always comes up with something better. Do these make you angry, frustrated, irritated, impatient, and annoyed?
Then comes the number of likes, comments, shares, etc. Deep down our mind has been nurtured that more likes mean more recognition. And who doesn’t want to be everyone’s favourite, right? Believing such a concept will create social anxiety and you will not be able to get into the outside world easily.
Always remember, it is okay to get only a few likes. It will not devalue your life. One can easily spot the difference between an admirer and a real friend in a time of crisis. It is absolutely fine not to do something creative or productive just because your friends are into it.
You can be happy on your own. Create, work out if your inner voice tells you to do so. Creation should only be a creation and not a competition. Work out should only be for healthy living, not flooding Instagram with meaningless hashtags.
5. Sexual content
Honestly, I do not know how many people watch sexual content. Almost everyone has heard that ‘watching pornography is not good for your mental health/ porn addiction is a slow potion” etc. All I can say is these words are true. Society will tell you that watching porn is normal.
There is no harm in it as long as it does not become an addiction and you assault someone. Is that so? Isn’t it like catch fish but don’t get water on your skin as they say watch it but do not get addiction? Easier said than done. It is normal to watch once in a blue moon. Most teenagers venture into it out of curiosity and physical changes due to puberty. Still, it is not recommended as it destroys the perception of real copulation.
However, I am not emphasising entirely on pornography. Sexual content is everywhere- in social media, advertising, song lyrics, short videos, movies, and web series. Even the jokes of elementary school kids are full of vulgarity and innuendo-laden. While again this seems to be normal to many intellectuals but personally, I feel this culture has created lots of anger problems, irritability, impatience. Because it makes our dopamine work tirelessly same as the porn does.
Our brain cannot differentiate as long as we get pleasures. Various misconceptions, voyeurism have rapidly increased due to this. Perhaps you have noticed that sexual thoughts always hover above your mind, you become restless, have always urge to indulge in them. Eventually, you develop a fetish, your perception of the opposite gender changes. You try to get rid of it because it hampers your daily work and mental peace but are unable to do so. And the loop goes on.
I know, many will say I am a sexist, everyone should control and limit themselves, I am confused between eroticism and vulgarity, etc. I am pretty much aware of the ‘subtle’ difference between erotic and raunchy content. Eroticism is passionate, mostly found in poems and arts.
It is a foolishness that you will only be out of sexual thought if you are away from it. Rather, divert your mind into something creative and productive. Work out regularly as it improves your well-being. It is also known as ‘sexual transmutation’ where one does not hold back the energy rather transmute it into something creative.
Trust me, an excessive sexual atmosphere destroys your love life. The world is full of violence because of its lusty nature and poor ‘genital urges’ control.
6. Improper breathing and no exercise
At the end of the tiresome day, you come home sit on the cosy sofa, breathe out relaxation and guess what? The cute little paunch comes out. Then comes the Netflix with ‘slouch mode’ activation with some cheese dipped chips. Sounds interesting? Obviously yes. Little do we know that it is a stress buster enveloping the slow poison inside our bodies.
The problem is not in relaxing, but improper breathing, excessive indulgence in fast food with little or no exercise. Cheat days are fine unless every day is a cheat day. Every time you are sad you crave sugar and other junk foods. It temporarily releases dopamine; increase insulin and you get high. The moment insulin falls you are back to your previous state. Eventually, the loop goes on.
A prolonged sedentary lifestyle slowly plays with your mind. A physical change may not be visible because not everyone gains weight or experiences acne. But the gut system eventually damages. I am sure everyone is aware of the brain and gut connection. No one is complete with one another. Impatience, anger, irritability grow because of this dopamine secretion habit.
Our body, especially the lungs is like a balloon. It increases while breathing in and decreases with breathing out. Our belly also works in the same structure. While such occurrence goes normal during sleep time, unknowingly it happens the opposite too, mostly during the day. Our body is not equipped with it resulting in disturbance in the mind, because blood circulation and oxygen supply get hampered.
Fix it with breathing exercises like pranayama. You are not here to know the techniques, rather you can search for them too. But surely, I can tell you once you get the peace of mind there will be no looking back. If you cannot exercise do some stretching and yoga too. It never goes wrong. Stretching relaxes the muscle and improves blood circulation. You will feel light. I can assure you from my personal experience.
What I have experienced is that eating clean and regular moderate exercise keeps your gut health good. Balanced gut health means more happiness, less irritability.
Yes, you need to practice healthy and clean eating habits. No insipid, steamed, boiled food is necessary. Just eat normally with less sugar and see the improvements in your overall well-being.
7. Procrastination
Too much social media, indulging in immense vulgarity, sedentary lifestyle- all three not only give you irritability, impatience, anger, and stress but also present quality procrastination. Sometimes lots of unfinished work piles up but people choose to ignore it and later regret not finishing the job. What is interesting is despite knowing this habit procrastinators still step on the trap, commonly known as ‘comfort zone’.
When you choose to delay your pending work, you are not getting relaxation, rather it will cause a disturbance. Because you know you have to complete the tasks anyway, there is no room for escaping, and all day you keep worrying about it instead of finishing. Irritability grows but work gets delayed and you get nothing.
It also causes sleep problems because deep in your subconscious mind your brain is aware of finishing pending works. Either people experience insomnia or dream too much because of insufficient quality sleep. Eventually, you wake up in a grumpy mood every single day.
Do the difficult first, followed by easy ones. The technique is also known as “eat the frog”. What happens if you have to eat a frog in the morning but delay till the night and keep thinking about it all day? If you eat the frog first then the rest of the day is full of peace, without any worry. Metaphor apart, the same thing happens with your daily life too.
Set a daily realistic goal and finish it off before going to bed. Trust me, you will be physically tired, mentally relaxed- resulting in a happy sleep.
8. Autocorrect and suggestions
Tell me honestly, when was the last time you typed a full piece of writing or message without any error, precisely without autocorrect and suggestions? I must confess, I heavily rely on autocorrect and suggestions. Most of the time I type thoroughly without any tension because I know these two friends are always there to help me. Rather a fair-weather friend I would say.
We are so brutally equipped with autocorrect and suggestions that we do not effort to write full words without any error. Misspelt a word? Don’t know the exact spelling? No worry autocorrect will rectify it. This is the mindset we are flourishing in our minds. Sometimes suggestions make such a beeline that I do not need to write a full sentence. A couple of clicks and the work is done!
Indirectly it plays with our mind, making the brain believe to hurry up, no need for waiting. This impacts a lot. We become intolerant because of that mode of the brain, and it is hard to handle. Eventually, we grapple with anger issues, impatience, and severe irritability.
Imagine you are in an exam hall just about to write a long paragraph. Pen and paper will stare at you, so will you. Would you write in messaging form or wait for a helper to give suggestions and correct misspelt words?
Practice daily journal with a pen on your diary, not on your phone or laptop. Try searching a physical dictionary instead of searching online. Switch off suggestions and autocorrection mode on your phone. Write full sentences. It may look silly but try it for the sake of your mental peace. See the changes.
Bottom line
So, either you are bored to see this or can relate with yourself. Perhaps, you have noticed that almost every point is linked to extreme indulgence in digital life such as fast internet, social media, expensive devices etc. No wonder these are the culprits in disguise. Moderate usage is the key to a balanced mind.
